Things have found a new level, in my feelings about the loss. Last year, I viewed this date with dread; this year, not at all. Now, maybe my spouse would comment that she notices something different about my behavior. She might even be right. I'm not typically introspective, to my detriment. But I really didn't dread this date. (Try me again in July, though.)
I worry about my mother, and that is a daily thing, rather than fretting about Dad's death. I spoke to her already today, and she didn't mention the date, so I wonder if she even recalls? Or if she was trying to spare my feelings? Hmm. Don't know.